Well this is the first time I'm blog-posting on this.

Blogger has had some weird revolutionary update so I'm kind of still getting my head around it. It's still easy to use, it's just annoying typing into a random box.

So.

i was just thinking.

Why is it,
that people are so stupid.

Why is it,
that I am such a nice fool sometimes,
and a cunning b*tch sometimes.
Human nature, I guess.

Either way, both times, I am "losing".
Coz when I am being "nice fool", I feel like I'm leading on/being used.
When I am a cunning b*tch... well I just want the ground to swallow me up. Although it is, of course, unintentional 99.99999% of the time (that .00001% comes from... a certain situation last week which I deeply regret. Prob one of the lowest things I've ever done.)

Perfectionism.
I am turning into a harsh judge of myself.
This is what happens when you spend too much time thinking about your studies.
Jks we all know I don't spend enough.

Anyways,
the point of this entry had something more to do with the fact that,
I, like many other girls,
am unfortunately like many other girls.
(^ what the? the certificate of education is clearly driving me mad)

I am stupid.
I am stupid indeed.

Yet I am just hoping that I prove myself to be somewhat intelligent by the end of the year.

JEEEEEEZ LOUISE so much self doubt this week.

I hate self doubt.
I am going to stop doubting myself.
From this moment.
Because surely, I do know my stuff.

.
..
...
*awkward silence*

I can't blame other things for my circumstances.
It is entirely up to me to turn my situation around.
I have got to stop blaming my teachers for the fact that they can't teach,

You know, now I'm so entirely convinced that I don't know anything.
But I do know things.
I dooooooooo.
Stop doubting yourself.
Stop it.

I feel like telling everyone I have a sac tomorrow is going to somehow affect my outcome.

I'm such a mental case XD