Guide to helping others without harming yourself. :)

Feeling others pain so hard you literally understand what the expression, "pulls at the heartstrings" means.

It's called empathy.

Being able to walk in someone else's shoes (in the figurative sense) is the number one best skill to have in life, in my opinion.

Sometimes the more you think about other people's situations, the more you feel like you are damaging yourself.

There are people who tell me, 

"Don't get involved too much, do yourself some good for once."

I can't really help it though.

It's difficult not to be involved when someone alongside you is suffering.

It's easier to ignore it, I guess.

It's better for my mental health.

It's beneficial to my academics.

But how can I advance in life, watching someone else fall backwards?

:/

I need to stop overthinking things.

Another thing I've often heard is,

"Would she care this much if the situation was reversed?"

^

Who says that, you wonder.

Well, truthfully, it's my own conscience that says that.

I know that if situations were reversed, it's pretty likely no one would engage themselves in their burdens as much as I would with theirs. 

Well, I take that back. I know some people who would.

Here's the thing when you're helping others:

You have to keep yourself sane enough to actually be able to help them.

Because if they're depending on you to light their way for that moment in time,

You need to keep strong otherwise they end up with nothing.

And when it comes to a stage where they no longer need help,

back away.

Don't expect the same back from them, don't see themselves as in debt to you, don't expect favours back.

No expectations, no disappointments. :)

If you end up weakening yourself in the process of helping someone else,

STOP.

It's never worth harming yourself emotionally or mentally in order to help someone else.

If you need help, don't expect that same person to help you back.

Maybe you're better off seeking help from someone who doesn't also have their own trauma to deal with.

People help each other all the time.

People also hurt each other all the time.

People who love each other hurt each other often.

You can't make anyone else responsible for your own mental anguish, is my motto.

If someone else has caused you pain, you're just facing that feeling your own mind has created. You can't really blame them for your pain.

The mind is a weapon as well as a defence.

1. Pull yourself together.

2. If you can't muster strength to pull yourself together for your own good, think about the people who love you. Because I guarantee there are many more around than you think. :)

3. If you are struggling, go to someone for help. 

4. Even helpers need help sometimes. :)